The Suspension Tightrope – Hammered

The suspension slate may have been wiped clean for Wayne Rooney, Yannick Bolasie, Jonas Olsson and Ravel Morrison over the weekend but the Tightrope sleeps for no man, as a new wave of miscreants were served up over the last couple of days to replenish the stocks and furnish this very article:

First and foremost amongst the bans this week is West Ham skipper Kevin Nolan. For a few weeks now, the midfielder’s form has been a talking point amongst Hammers fans – having failed to score since the season opener at home to Cardiff, many have questioned his place as a regular in Sam Allardyce’s XI. Fantasy managers agree, with sales of the once prolific Nolan outstripping purchases in each of the last 12 Gameweeks. Those sales are set to escalate after he received a red card for a rash challenge on Jordan Henderson in the drubbing by Liverpool last Saturday. Nolan can put his feet up over the busy pre-Christmas schedule as a three-match ban forces him to sit out league games against Sunderland and Manchester United in addition to the Capital One Cup Quarter Final with Spurs. He’ll be available again for the Gameweek 18 clash with Arsenal but, given his lack of impact, it remains to be seen whether Big Sam will hand him an immediate return.

Joining Nolan on the ban list, but only for the next round of fixtures, is arguably the man who replaced him at Newcastle – Yohan Cabaye. A yellow card in Saturday’s triumph at United is unlikely to have dampened the Frenchman’s mood following his weekend winner but, as this was his fifth indiscretion of the season, he’ll sit out the visit of Southampton in Gameweek 16. Meanwhile, completing the roll-call of the Saturday fixtures, Stoke’s Jon Walters also toppled off the Tightrope and will sit out next weekend’s trip to Hull but I doubt he’ll care much for his yellow card, given his side’s dramatic 3-2 triumph over Chelsea.

On to Sunday and each of the two fixtures had their fair share of Tightrope action, with seven players across the four teams under threat of a ban. Fabian Delph and James McCarthy were the unlucky pair to lose their balance, having spent seven and four weeks respectively on the Tightrope. Both will now be free to indulge in some Christmas shopping as their sides face up to their next tests – Delph’s Aston Villa entertain under-fire David Moyes’ United, while McCarthy’s Everton welcome Fulham to Goodison; the pair will be back in the fold for Gameweek 17.

One final piece of housekeeping sees a couple of new faces on the Tightrope widget, in the shape of Everton pair Gareth Barry and – possibly the first goalkeeper to ever appear on these pages – Tim Howard. Both picked up their fourth cautions of the campaign during yesterday’s draw at the Emirates and have to navigate a further four league matches without incident before the threshold for a ban is increased to 10 yellows on New Year’s Day (or Gameweek 20 to you and me).