The latest episode, created mid-afternoon today, was not recorded amidst a playground, although, at times, the background noise and smutty innuendo would suggest as much.

While the fruit of our loins play merrily in adjacent rooms, Granville and I retire to find some quiet and systematically pull apart another week of Fantasy football with all the usual regulars thrown in. Granville has a 22-point lead to show for his efforts, while I’m doing all I can to remain calm after what can best be described as a false start. The green arrows are coming. Surely they’re coming?

Join the kindergarten cops via this link or stream the bedtime story using the handy player below…

About The Author

“Mark created the beast. He's now looking to tame it.”

Mark

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  1. Which player out of this three to right hand man baines until January transfers: I dont have liverpool or spurs but gibbs is .6 cheaper and Arsenal have proven strong at the back.

    Glen Johnson
    Kyle Walker
    Keiran Gibbs

    • 1 year, 6 months ago
  2. Last....

    • 1 year, 6 months ago
  3. they are only 500,000 and 260,000 and they are giving me out advice, eh think i should turn this off

    • 1 year, 6 months ago
  4. Is it worth getting rid of podolski and fellaini for suarez and duff for a 4 point hit?

    • 1 year, 6 months ago
    1. yep - or go for Bale if you have the $$$

      • 1 year, 6 months ago
  5. Morning all

    Who to captain out of this motley crew? ... currently with Bale but think Tevez may do some damage .... or then again Ivanovic ....oooh my head hurts

    Vorm

    Baines, Jagielka, Vertonghen, Ivanovic

    Dembele, Santi Cazorla, Kagawa, Bale

    Tevez, Pogrebnyak

    • 1 year, 6 months ago
  6. Ivanovic or Mcauley? both have clean sheet potentials,

    Otherwise team is:
    Mannone
    Vertonghen, Jenk, McAuley or Ivanovic
    Santi, Fell, Michu, Ramirez, Haz
    Tevez, Ba,

    • 1 year, 6 months ago
    1. Ivanovic is the go to man.

      • 1 year, 6 months ago
  7. Transfer Fellaini out for Bale on GW8?

    • 1 year, 6 months ago

Scout Picks

For Gameweek 35

  • Adrián
  • Zabaleta
  • Ivanovic
  • Skrtel
  • Salah
  • Gerrard
  • Mata
  • Eriksen
  • Suárez
  • Adebayor
  • Aguero
  • Caulker
  • Ramsey
  • Lambert

Comments

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Next Six Ticker

Watchlist

Goalkeepers

Last updated: 20 Apr, 2014 2:40pm
Player Club Factors
No Change Hart MCI B, Vs
Up Mannone SUN B, Vs, £
Up De Gea MUN C, Vs
No Change Szczesny ARS B, Vs
Up Foster WBA B, Vs
Down Cech CHE B, Vs, Inj
No Change Guzan AVL B
Up Stockdale FUL B, £

Defenders

Last updated: 20 Apr, 2014 7:30pm
Player Club Factors
Up Terry CHE A
Up Demichelis MCI B, Vs
Up Koscielny ARS B, Vs
Up Smalling MUN B, Vs
Up Kaboul TOT B
No Change Alonso SUN B, Vs, OoP, £
Down Skrtel LIV A
No Change Vlaar AVL C, £
Down Coleman EVE B, VsX
Up Ridgewell WBA C, Vs, OoP, £
Up Caulker CAR A
Up Heitinga FUL B, £

Midfielders

Last updated: 20 Apr, 2014 7:29pm
Player Club Factors
Up Eriksen TOT A, Vs
Up Mata MUN A, Vs
Up Ramsey ARS A, Vs
Up Sterling LIV A, £
Up Nasri MCI B, Vs
Down Gerrard LIV A
Down Lallana SOT B
Down Silva MCI C, Vs, Inj
No Change Johnson SUN C, Vs
Up Amalfitano WBA A, Vs, £

Forwards

Last updated: 20 Apr, 2014 7:29pm
Player Club Factors
No Change Suárez LIV A
Up Aguero MCI C, Vs
Up Rooney MUN A, Vs
Down Adebayor TOT B
No Change Dzeko MCI B, Vs, Rest, £
Up Podolski ARS A, Vs
Up Wickham SUN A, Vs, £
Up Bony SWA A
Down Lukaku EVE B, VsX
No Change Rodallega FUL B, £

Selection Factors

A, B, C Current Form
Vs Favourable Fixtures
VsX Unfavourable Fixtures
Rest Rotation Risk
Inj Injured/Returning from Injury
OoP Out of Position
£ Potential Bargain
Sus Suspended/Near Suspension

“A hit a week every week and finish in the top 50k is just fine and dandy for me. I play the game for the fun and how it improves watching Stoke vs Cardiff on a Monday night in November.”

Wakey on his fantasy management style