Community Watch – Matchweek 9

MOZAMPIQUE

just to point out the table has grabbandaglish or whatever they are called on the wrong points

Never mind all those lost match points, Salahmons are cleaning up on the literary awards. Well done Boris.

When can we expect the monthly awards to be announced?

Two points on the post

A) Who are the Salmon islands?

b) Who says Mozampique are invincible? I see 1 defeat next to their name

#HalaGrabbangladesh

All in all, the Salahmon Islands midweek clash against Germané had turned out to be an unmitigated disaster. Straight after kick off the Salahmon captain, Lord, was scythed down and spent the rest of match playing on one leg and with both his eyes bandaged. Despite a valiant effort to get back into the match, in the end the Germanés were just too strong and they held on for a win. To make matters worse, when the entire team went back to the GreenWindmill, they discovered that the Cech’s gift of flight was apparently a one off, and they had removed all aerial capabilities of the Green Windmill. And rjcv177 had finished the last barrel of kava too, so the team were really at rock bottom, with only three days to get home to the Salahmon Islands in time for the next match against the Gaboniadinisians.

Luckily, Swanmore still had connections with the Germané Navy from his old war days, and he managed to secure voyage for the team on board an old clipper ship. Having hoisted the GreenWindmill on board, the Salahmon Island crew set sail for their home, tired, downtrodden and kava-less. That night, as a storm raged outside, the crew stowed themselves below deck and Cap’n Swanmore, as he insisted on being called much to the chagrin of Boris, regaled his tails of the Gaboniadinisians, or the ‘Gabons’ as he called them. “Ne’er ‘ave I met a more cutthroat, bloodthirsty mob as those Gabons”, he warned. “They’ll dive in the box if you so much as breath near ‘em, and as for the offside rule…PAH…’t means nothin’ to ‘em!”. Keen to change the subject, Boris asks which route they will be taking back home. “Aarghhh, we’ll be sailin’ aroun’ the Cape o’ Good Hope”, says Swanmore, who was getting rather into character. “So…we’ll be passing the Gaboniadini coast then?”, asks Sune.

“SHIP AHOY!”. The Salahmon Islands crew ran on deck into utter chaos – the sails were in tatters, barrels of cargo were flying around and Knuckles, who had been assigned to the crows nest and had raised the alarm, had vomited so much it covered most of the deck! Cap’n Swanmore drew out his spyglass and searched the horizon, while the rest of the crew slipped around the vomit-strewn floor. “Well blow me hole, if it ain’t the Gabons!”, he declared, and sure enough across the giant, foamy waves, a pirate ship twice the size of their clipper was sailing towards them. The Gabons wore nothing except glow in the dark, green mankinis and each man was lined up at the edge of their ship armed with something long, green and menacing looking. Hysteria hit the Salahmon Island crew like Patrice Evra’s foot into a Marsiellaise face, with only Boris and Swanmore managing to keep a degree of coolness. “What are those green things they’ve got?”, Boris shouted to Swanmore, who brought up his spyglass to look again. “THOSE CHEATING GABONESE SCUMBAGS!”, cried Swanmore, who then addressed the pirates, who were just about close enough to board them now, “YOU KNOW THOSE INFERNAL THINGS WERE BANNED SINCE THE W….”

Swanmore never got to finish his sentence, as the Gabons raised their green weapons to their mouths and blew. The noise was so intense that the Salahmon Islanders would be glad they had brought a change of underwear. “Vuvuzelas! Salah protect us….”, whimpered Boris when the noise briefly stopped, only to clamp his hands over his ears when they recommenced, and eventually the entire Salahmon Island crew passed out from the insufferable, claxon-like cacophony. The Gabons crept aboard and set about their business, pulling the earplugs from their ears. “Well looky here lads, looks like we just apprehended the world’s most expensive windmill!”, grinned the pirate leader Jazz, who despite the mankini still looked incredibly masculine. “’Til we meet on the fields, Mr Bodega, and thanks ye for the booty!”.

Did this leave the Salahmon Islanders all at sea? Could Boris lead the islanders back home in time and win back the GreenWindmill from the Gabons? Or would Swanmore lead a mutiny against the beautiful, brave captain?

Lovely Jubbly!! Manager of the week!!! .. clearly a team effort but thanks guys! 🙂

Keep it going Hungary Neville!!

We were gutted to be defeated by such a shambolic bunch of misfits last week. And morata getting that stupid yellow card at the end, which cost us the fixture.

But, we'll turn that around this week, especially with the whole team captaining Aguero 😎

Let’s go again!

Hungary Neville;

Captain: Walkman666
Bench: LeGod, Korbendallas, Rhinos

Reussia:

Captain: DD
Bench: Deulofail, TJ, Anand

Lineups, please. 🙂

Hungary Neville +62

Daniels x 2
Sane x 2
Aguero
-----------------------------------------

Blindia

Sterling
Jesus x 3, Wilson

Sorry but I'm rapidly losing interest in this. Some of my own team don't bother updating their team but we are expected to pick a Capt and bench. Articles on here rarely get updated and here we are on Saturday night with no idea who is starting for who. If anyone wants my place please feel free 🙁

Ibeland:

Captain: BB-8
Bench: BC1, Netley Lucas, El Fenomeno R9.

Team Grabbangladesh line-up

JohnnyOrphan (c)
JK, AK, Lateriser12, Eden Hazardous, The Boot, Nikesh

Anyone from Messidonia about?

Emre Canada agreed to line up with Goldman (c) and a bench of COK3Y5MURF, Addyk and Veezeeboy.

However, there are unconfirmed reports of our captain suffering serious damage at a Christmas party hours before the deadline, so expect the unexpected!

Hungary Neville 453 - 395 Blindia

4 wins on the bounce for us. Unlucky Blindia, the tie was over at the end of the Chelsea game really.

Don't know the exact scores,but Balegium have been comfortably beaten by Matagascar. Should be the biggest win margin of the week. Well played Matagascans.

Villian - Sir Harold

Mozampique final score -- 383

Kenyaya -- ???

The Gaboniadinis refused to be distracted by our offers of chemical-laden kebabs and limitless Kava - or the challenge of parking a bus in the Pacific Islands - and deservedly prevailed over the Salahmons (something like 386-350 according to the local Mystic Meg). Well done all.

Looks like Messidonia gets back to winning ways with a very high score of 496p against Emre Canada's good effort of 442p.

Ibeland 450 - 376 Fashanu Zealand by my calculations. Well done lads.

Looks like the Gabons got one over on us, Gaboniadini 386 - 348 Salahmon Islands.
Well done guys, good match.

\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/\o/

A close game. We were in it until the second half of the Man City game. Goals by Otamendi and Silva did us. Well played Chech Republic

Does anyone have any idea about a live spreadsheet which will automatically update the scores?

Sorry Piquers - made some bad decisions this week.