[sbu_large_image] Opinion
24 September 2016 1938 comments
Mark Mark
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I’ve got results but I think I may have just lost the dressing room.

There have been several turning points.

Firstly, my continual underestimation of Etienne Capoue’s ability has caused dissenting murmurings since week one.

I bought the guy for one job and one job only.

He’s meant to be there when I need him – springing to life to deliver me a handy two points when my big signings are in the stands.

Somewhere along the line, he’s missed a meeting or his misread the job description. Either way, he seems intent on embarrassing me with his unfeasible and unsustainable strike rate.

I’ve stuck to my guns. He’s benched again today but nobody, including me, is very happy about it.

There’s talk of changing formation – of switching to all-out-attack just so that Capoue can get minutes.

In truth, I’m tempted. At least to get an incentive to drop in on a floodlit Turf Moor on Monday night.

As it is, Burnley against Watford sounds like x-certificate stuff, made all the more chilling by the prospect that Capoue will undermine my judgement further with another sublimely taken goal.

On top of this, my transfer policy is now in question.

I’ve managed to get away with ushering Eden Hazard quietly out of the back door.

There’s hardly been a whisper about that – those opening three Gameweeks now seem forgotten.

Clearly, the lads remember how he let us down last season. I think they were thankful that I’d not fallen under his spell again.

But my other Gameweek 6 move has provoked a much bigger reaction.

There’s talk that my decision to eject Zlatan Ibrahimovic is personal. Accusations that there wasn’t room enough in the dressing room for two swollen egos.

He didn’t go quietly, either.

“Zlatan is not happy. Zlatan says that your blind faith in Aguero and your concept that Lukaku will show consistency is ridiculous. You will see that he will blank at Bournemouth. You are a fool to turn your back on Zlatan.”

Yeah. Whatever. There’s the door, don’t forget your hair bands.

I fully accept that it would be just like Zlatan to punish me.

Today’s early kick-off will be another 90 minutes of flinching and fidgeting. The forthcoming Old Trafford meetings with Stoke and Burnley also look to be terrifying prospects.

But I’m in a decision-making business and, as I’ve said before, this season is forcing me to make some big ones.

Lukaku and Sanchez had to stay. As for Aguero – he’s just Aguero and he comes tattooed with the captain’s armband.

But I admit – “Mark might have made an error.”

Mark Mark created the beast. He's now looking to tame it.

1,938 Comments Login to Post a Comment
  1. Psojkee
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Capoue or MCauley to start? Already have Foster

  2. Siggy in the Middle
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Slimani to start?

  3. Lizard Lips
    10 years, 1 month ago

    (a) Coleman
    (b) Vertonghen

    Vertonghen hasn't scored or assisted for ages so leaning A.

    1. Manilaman
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Gets bonus though

  4. Hurricane Gilbert
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Firmimo to Son because of rumours stating that he isn't starting?

    1. bojack
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Maybe.

      So far my two weeks with Firmino is looking likely to have resulted in precisely -4.

  5. Ruffio
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Done last minute Sanchez to kdb. Good move!? Just for this week!

    1. Weasel Boy
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Same here

  6. Pinky Blinders
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Who you most scared of not owning this week?

    1. MY DJ NAME IS PIMP CURRY
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Walcott.

      Mark this post, he'll be the top scoring Arsenal player. Then will be Iwobi, THEN Sanchez

    2. BbBb
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Mane

    3. SW6
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Lukaku

    4. bojack
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Lukaku.

    5. Drip Doctor
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Costa

    6. Brap.
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Any Liverpool midfielders

  7. pundit of punts
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Any last minute team news that I missed?

    1. Defcons are for Kinnear
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Firmino giving birth

      1. pundit of punts
        10 years, 1 month ago

        Really?

        1. Defcons are for Kinnear
          10 years, 1 month ago

          erm......

    2. Numb
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Rumours

      Lovren not starting (Berb's usual source)

      Firmino benched - less reliable source

      Rooney dropped - media sources

      1. pundit of punts
        10 years, 1 month ago

        Cheers

      2. Evs
        • Has Moderation Rights
        10 years, 1 month ago

        Wtf ?!

        Firmino was in berbs Twitter team !

        1. Numb
          10 years, 1 month ago

          Yeah, that's why I say less reliable source. Think he'll play

  8. MY DJ NAME IS PIMP CURRY
    10 years, 1 month ago

    G2G?

    Pickford Mandanda
    Baines Holebas McAuley Amat Daniels
    Sterling Antonio Capoue Mane Fletcher
    Ibra Kun Lukaku

    0.3m ITB

    1. MY DJ NAME IS PIMP CURRY
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Anyone? Please? Two minutes till deadline

  9. MarvelouSuccess
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Anyone captaining Antonio?

    1. BbBb
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Lol

  10. Weasel Boy
    • Fantasy Football Scout Member
    10 years, 1 month ago

    City triple up lol

  11. Pariße
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Evans or Kone, already have Foster?

    1. makaveli123
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Kone. Goal threat 🙂

      1. Pariße
        10 years, 1 month ago

        Thanks. Went for it in the last second 🙂

  12. DV8R
    • Fantasy Football Scout Member
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Which one please?

    A) Walker + Firmino
    B) Kosc + Coutinho

    1. BbBb
      10 years, 1 month ago

      B

  13. BbBb
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Any Utd team leaks?

    1. Team Cruel
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Roon not starting

      1. BbBb
        10 years, 1 month ago

        Hope not

  14. Team Cruel
    • Fantasy Football Scout Member
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Pens down

    in 3... 2...

  15. wbm
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Heaton / Foster
    Walker / Baines / Holebas / Smith / Amat
    Firmino / STERLING / Antonio / Snodgrass / Capoue
    Aguero / Lukaku / COSTA

    Or

    Heaton / Foster
    Walker / Baines / Holebas / Smith / Amat
    Firmino / SANCHEZ / Antonio / Snodgrass / Capoue
    Aguero / Lukaku / DEENEY

    So basically
    Sterling + Costa or Sanchez + Deeney

  16. Gerci
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Lovren, Matip or Clyne?

    1. @persecuted_by_mods
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Holding matip ndong

  17. Defcons are for Kinnear
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Breaking: Firmino gone into labour

    1. bojack
      10 years, 1 month ago

      As a replacement for Jeremy Corbyn?

    2. red devil 7
      10 years, 1 month ago

      quick call dr.eva

  18. Zlatan Time
    10 years, 1 month ago

    3 minutes, make sure you pressed the WC button...

    1. Pasqualinho
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Ah, yes. Good point...

  19. Debauchy
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Dont dither , time is nigh

  20. Viprin
    10 years, 1 month ago

    United line up?

    1. Zlatan Time
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Rooney benched.

  21. Pigsinblankets
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Will Holebas play?!

    1. Jimmers
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Unlikely. Get your bench in order

  22. Evs
    • Has Moderation Rights
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Numb...
    Have you ditched zlatan for Rashford ?

    1. FPL Puppy
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Have YOU? 😉

      1. Evs
        • Has Moderation Rights
        10 years, 1 month ago

        No

    2. Numb
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Yep

      1. Evs
        • Has Moderation Rights
        10 years, 1 month ago

        Ballsy

        I was toying with it to beef up MF, too late now

        In zlatan I trust 🙄

  23. FPL Puppy
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Rumour has it that a pizza has been delivered. Stay tuned! #pizzatoe #pizzaabductor

  24. JØ
    10 years, 1 month ago

    .Rooney benched. Get Rashford.

    1. KOLASINA(C)
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Oh

  25. Lizard Lips
    10 years, 1 month ago

    (a) Coleman
    (b) Vertonghen

    Vertonghen hasn't scored or assisted for ages so leaning A, who would you pick. I have Baines as well.

  26. The Tinkerman
    10 years, 1 month ago

    Locked in. Praying for better than last week.

    Foster (stk)
    McAuley (stk) Valenica (LEI) Toby (MID) Baines (bou)
    Ozil (CHE) Antonio (SOU) Pereyra (bur) Bolasie (bou)
    Aguero (swa)(C) Ibra (LEI)(VC)

    1. Pipermaru
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      10 years, 1 month ago

      I would take my last GW points without hesitation 😛

  27. Jafooli
    10 years, 1 month ago

    BINGO 😎

    1. Defcons are for Kinnear
      10 years, 1 month ago

      I'm here. Where's my prize?

  28. Defcons are for Kinnear
    10 years, 1 month ago

    @MANUTD OFFCIAL: Ibrahimovic hasn't travelled to Leicester today

    1. Numb
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Lol

    2. Zlatan Time
      10 years, 1 month ago

      The game is in Manchester...

    3. French Gooner
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      10 years, 1 month ago

      hahahhahahaha

    4. SUPERMAN
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Ban!

  29. ANDER.
    10 years, 1 month ago

    I will answer every question just 2 mins later.

  30. 1966 was a great year for E…
    10 years, 1 month ago

    WILCARDERS

    Double check you've pressed the button. Then check again.

    1. Numb
      10 years, 1 month ago

      Too late!