It’s dull ache; a nagging undeniable sickness in the pit of the stomach that soon disperses on distraction, but makes its return every time my mind recalls this evening’s events at St James’ Park. All this couldn’t be more self-inflicted.
Those up early enough to take in this morning’s “Preamble” will be aware of the cause. Faced with fielding at least one Liverpool defender against Newcastle, I decided to “be clever” and field both Konchesky and Kyrkiakos on the premise that an out-of-form Newcastle would splutter against a Liverpool defence that, on current form, was the most miserly in the league.
I duly played both my Liverpool defenders and chose to bench Andy Carroll to back my hunch to the hilt. That was undoubtedly my worst decision of my Fantasy season. You surely don’t need me to go over the facts of tonight’s 3-1 result; please spare me from that…
While there was some logic behind it, I chose to ignore the fact that, before tonight’s game, Carroll had scored a goal or an assist in 8 of Newcastle’s last 9 games. On these very pages, in this very column a few days ago, I noted how Carroll had returned points and kept Newcastle afloat despite their dismal form. Somehow, for some reason, I chose to ferret these facts away in a cupboard in my head and drown out the screams with my “clever” new plan.
Such an error was overdue to be fair. I haven’t felt the sting of such an mistake this season so far and it’s a condition that most Fantasy Managers have to suffer once or twice in a campaign. The trick now is to lock it away, somehow rediscover the hunger and move on. I can hope for a miracle from the rest of my team, a freak bout of flu to bring Carroll off my bench, but the cold facts are that I’m staring at a big red arrow and my worst points tally of the season.
This all comes a week after I’d climbed to my best FPL ranking and closed the gap on rival Granville to 3 points. I don’t need bloody Alanis Morissette to point out the irony of it all. It’s no coincidence either.
The real problem is I can’t even put it down as a “lesson learned”; I’m pretty sure I’ve had this lesson ten times over the years, filed it under “common sense” and forgotten it.
Two things about this game we play are clear to me tonight. Firstly, it’s bloody hard to recall lessons learned and recall mistakes from the past – particularly the one that states “Never follow a good Gameweek by trying to be a smartarse”.
Secondly, and perhaps most poignant of all, Fantasy Football is a painful game when you’ve only got yourself to blame.

