I couldn’t help but note that, the minute I allowed myself to waver from expected behaviour, it got noticed and questioned.
My decision to draft in Sunderland’s Wahbi Khazri was an interesting little experiment.
While it failed to bear fruit, it did demonstrate the waves created when a Fantasy Football manager attempts to wrestle back control and show an iota of emotionally driven inspiration.
Clearly, I wasn’t expected to bring in Khazri. Not only does he play as part of a struggling, unfashionable outfit in Fantasy terms, he misses Gameweek 30 and therefore breaks every rule that we should be adhering to with our current crop of transfers.
Maybe his acquisition does give me further problems in a week’s time – I was just driven in my attempts to find a new and perhaps unrecognised source of points.
I was desperate to attempt to break away from the accepted pattern of behaviour – to almost demonstrate that there is still a human being, with whims and weaknesses steering my squad and that I’m not just being totally governed by a carefully constructed spreadsheet mapping out the most efficient route to optimum returns.
Perhaps Khazri was a bad move. Perhaps I will pay a price of sorts. However, for that one evening I was willing for an assist – a deflection of Kaboul’s posterior from a Khazri delivery – that would add a spark to my Gameweek.
There’s a danger that we’re losing that very spark. That we’re so sure and safe in our selections that we’ll begin to lose some of the joy that has previously come packaged with every set of fixtures.
This morning I should probably be considering Ashley Williams and Gylfi Sigurdsson as my two trades. Instead, I’m pondering Yaya Toure and, wait for it, Aleks Kolarov.
I know there will be some smug happiness to be gained when Williams fetches a clean sheet and Sigurdsson curls in a direct free-kick, but just that excitement of backing potentially more explosive assets is so alluring.
I’m struggling to accept that I need to play safe. I want to get points and I want to get them in style. If that means missing out completely then I’ll have to accept that.
Sometimes I just need to get more from this game. It’s almost like I’ve been a user for so long, I need to seek out bigger thrills than an inconsequential green arrow.
I need what Kolarov might just give me.
