It was a week of plunder for big gameweek hunters with chips flying, hits mounting, and Boris needing an extra column for his spreadsheet. The ticker tape parade for triple captainers drew record crowds, and in the heady excitement all thoughts of the bill, and what to do about all those blanking assets were forgotten. The hangover has barely had a chance to kick in before we get to do it all again – no wonder we’ve all got double vision.
THE RESULTS ARE IN …
Krul Intentions 5-2 Hanging by a Fred
The Freds were left hanging thanks to Krul Intentions doing a rare favour for the rest of the league. It was more like masochism in the H2Hs, where Trent (TC) was deployed as a loss leader, and TS Sai took full advantage; but the Kruls unleashed hell in the Squad match, with Albertgud and Rocco10 racking up the points.
Son of a Gunn 6-0 The Hairy Henry
The big guns were wheeled out to make it hairy for the Henrys, and Legomane led the charge with a 4-goal salvo as Son of a Gunn pounded their way back into title contention. Mark Sutherns chipped in with a clean sheet, and with the Artillery providing plenty of cover, it was soon adieu.
Shot to the Hart and Yorke to blame 2-2 No Fuchs Given
Shot to the Hart will be crestfallen at missing the chance to strike a blow against apathy; while No Fuchs Given will have barely noticed the lost opportunity to make up ground on the league leaders. FPL Marchin did perk up with 143 points, and a brace, in the H2Hs, but Jomikijiq replied and the Hart/Yorks restored parity in the Squad match.
Footstock Alumni 1-2 Bachmann and Robben
The Alumni were held to account by the Caped Crusaders in a hard-fought boardroom clash. The spoils were shared in the H2Hs thanks to goals from Langdon82 and ameenkw, but justice prevailed in the Squad match as Bachmann and Robben cashed in to secure a 2-1 victory. Can the superheroes build on this?
Shearer’s bunch of Flowers 0-3 Defoe King Unbelievables
The Florists were deflowered by the Defoe Kings in a high scoring Squad match. Jonjo Shall_We? did with 148 points, but the rest of the bunch wilted in the face of the vitriol unleashed by goktugerce, d1sable, and Hasselbaink Forever.
Jimmy Floyd Hamsterbaink 4-0 The Nameless Ones
Boris Bodega struck a blow for the furry rodent community, and single-handedly sent the Nameless Ones scurrying back to anonymity, with 151 points, and a hat-trick, in the H2Hs. What’s her name’s crew had no response and have work to do to regain recognition in the title race.
Catch me if U Kane 11-0 Lloris the Hounds
What should have been a closely matched chase between contenders for the final Champions League qualifying berths, turned into a caning by the Kanes that left the Hounds howling for the RSPCA. Jarvish led the rout with 141 points, but even he will have needed Rachel Riley’s help to count this score.
Carroll’s Christmas Island 2-12 Toxic Seaman
It was a night of plunder for the Seaman as the hapless Carrolls totally failed to repel boarders. There was little hint of the carnage to come as fplhints insinuated a brace in the H2Hs, but the Seaman were soon raising the Jolly Roger, with the entire crew scoring centuries. Something smelly is rising to the surface.
Too Krul for Siu 3-3 Fantastic Mr Fox
The Foxes picked up the scent and, with the entire skulk hitting tons, were on track to deliver another rounded performance; however, their upward progress was checked thanks to a rear-guard hat-trick by QPR Caribbean.
Hey MaccaReina! 10-4 Ayew Lonesome Tonight
The prize for the most bonkers match of the week, and probably the season, goes to the Maccas and Ayew Lonesome Tonight. We don’t have time to show all the goals, but RWD90 started the mayhem with 141 pts and a foursome; and this was more than matched by Devo-McDuff’s 163-point haul. The carnage was one-sided in the Squad match with Seb Wassel (141 pts) and Bertilad (138 pts) finding the right steps to rein in victory for the Maccas.
The Rooney Tunes 0-3 Free Britney’s Areola
The Rooneys sharpened their studs for this attractive matchup, but Free Britney’s Areola proved more than a handful. The Britneys were good value for their pair in the H2Hs, with Anuragkhetanfc showing good form; and they hit them one more time in the squad match.
Hwang King in a Wood 6-2 Flying without Ings
It looked so promising for Flying without Ings when sreethe1 caught a thermal in the H2Hs; but they ran out of fuel in the Squad match, where strong performances by @_FPLJJ, CMFPL_Benno, and PD FC, ensured a happy ending for the Hwang Kings.
The full results can be found here:
SKLW – Live scores & League tables – Google Sheets
PLAYER OF THE WEEK
In a week when it only takes three Liverpool assets to score 100 pts it was difficult to stand out, but Devo-McDuff and Boris Bodega get the front-page coverage this week for their astute deployment of the Free Hit chip. Devo must be wondering how it is possible to be the top points scorer, notch four goals, and still be on the end of a thrashing; but he does get the accolade of being this week’s top banana.
HOW IT STANDS
The Freds are hanging onto their lead, but Toxic Seaman have now joined No Fuchs Give and Son of a Gunn in the chasing pack. At the bottom, Flying without Ings are close to securing qualification for the You’re Ropey League.
The full table is as follows:
COMING UP NEXT
Match Day 16 is already upon us, and the tie of the round is Hanging by a Fred’s visit to No Fuchs Given (can someone please wake them up). Son of a Gunn will be looking to take advantage of any slip-ups, but will have Bachmann and Robben on their tail. The match-up between Toxic Seaman and Jimmy Floyd Hamsterbaink should make for an interesting Podcast. At the bottom, Flying without Ings picked the wrong week to do the Hey MaccaReina!
Want more? Check out the soon to be released Podcast by Greyhead and Boris, complete with analysis, interviews, recriminations, and all the spreadsheets you can eat.
That’s all for now, stay safe, and let’s keep the conflict on the pitch.
