634x258 Preamble
21 March 2015 1735 comments
Mark Mark
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In case you missed it (unlikely), Chelsea presented their “Penalty Puzzle” this week, claiming that, when it comes to their propensity to win spot-kicks, logic is being defied.

The article arrived off the back of a string of ignored penalty claims and, notably, just a couple of months after Jose Mourinho was fined for claiming that referees were being influenced to give decisions against the Blues.

Maybe it’s just me, but I can’t help but be cynical about all this.

Admittedly, I love a conspiracy theory. I rarely hesitate to speculate when there is just a shred of opportunity to do so – particularly when it comes to events that could influence my Fantasy thinking.

Mourinho and Chelsea have fanned my flames this season, providing ample evidence for me to jump to wild conclusions on Diego Costa’s injury problems. I rarely need encouragement, but the recent noises stemming from Stamford Bridge have provided just that.

I can’t help but recall the events that followed Mourinho’s recent comments regarding Paris St Germain’s levels of aggression. Here Mourinho ironically singled out Zlatan Ibrahimovic when analysing PSG’s display in the first leg of their Champions League tie….

“Because a team with fantastic players was the team with a record number of fouls, was the team making foul after foul, was the team which stopped Hazard with fouls all the time, was the team attacking the man in possession of the ball with two or three players with some very aggressive actions, a team where – even a player like Zlatan [Ibrahimovic], a typical attacking player – came back when they lost the ball and attacked Hazard from behind when we were countering.”

A week later the towering Swede tracked back again, was late in his “tackle” on Oscar and triggered a reaction from Chelsea players that some described as “disgraceful”. The suggestion was that their actions were almost rehearsed – primed by Mourinho’s words just days prior to the match. More wild speculation.

The club’s decision to publish this week’s article has done little to calm claims of conspiracies.

To be fair, they talk in facts: in “28 Premier League games this season where we have been awarded just two penalties”. However, it’s perhaps careless to describe this statistic as “abnormally low”, even when historical data suggests that their current tally is below average based on previous campaigns.

Last season Arsenal were awarded just three penalties, the season before that, Spurs failed to win any. For all the statistical patterns of touches in the box versus penalties won, there are glitches in the system: random variables that serve up “abnormalties”. Chelsea’s spot-kick count could be regarded as perfectly “normal”.

So what did the article achieve? Did it even seek to “achieve” anything?

One thing is certain, it ensured that Mourinho would have the opportunity to comment on the issue in Friday’s press conference without implicating himself…

“You gave so much importance to that article. I read it, I think it is a very objective article, it is just the number, no more than that. It’s is not an opinion article that can lead to a discussion…It is not open to opinions. It is just pure numbers, the numbers always tell the truth, no agendas, no intention. I just believe that it is an article with numbers in the same way that numbers always tell the truth.”

Whatever Jose claims – statistics are often open to interpretation, and the term “abnormally low” does smack of an opinion based on these particular numbers.

So, as Chelsea make their way to the KC Stadium, the title tantalisingly within reach, the subject of penalty awards has been brought to the fore. Blown out of proportion by the press but undoubtedly fed by the words originating from the club.

Now let’s throw Michael Oliver into the mix.

As referees go, Sunday’s is a colourful character. A World Cup official in the making, Oliver is nonetheless prone to swing from the sublime to the ridiculous. He’s high profile, in a high-profile scenario: a cocktail for controversy. Oliver has already awarded eight penalties across his 20 league appearances this season – awarding two in one match on two occasions.

Does Michael Oliver go into Sunday’s cauldron oblivious to Chelsea’s “penalty puzzle”? Is he prepared to turn away spot-kick claims on Humberside?

I’ll be one of many watching on in fascination come Sunday, looking out for every stray foot and hand that swings the way of a Chelsea player, cross or shot.

Will I be backing my own speculation by handing my captaincy to Eden Hazard? I’ve certainly considered it.

Irrespective of failing to win a single spot-kick on the road, Hazard has scored in four of his last five away league matches.

As Jose says, “numbers always tell the truth” and, just like Jose, I love a conspiracy theory.

Mark Mark created the beast. He's now looking to tame it.

  1. Heydudes13
    • 14 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    F*** it. Just did Cazorla > Mané.

    1. Christina.
      • 15 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      I did Alexis to mane

      1. Heydudes13
        • 14 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        Still got Alexis.

        1. Christina.
          • 15 Years
          10 years, 8 months ago

          😥

    2. Zombie
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Nice move

    3. Konig Luther
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      ... and left Mané on bench

    4. Davros
      • 16 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Good call imo

  2. Davros
    • 16 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Pens down

  3. Christina.
    • 15 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Just sold Sanchez

    lol

    1. Gooner97
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      lol

    2. Captain Peacock
      • 11 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      For who?

    3. Piggs Boson
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      😯

    4. Sean.
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Good luck,did the same 🙂

    5. Moin
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      You should've sorted out your defence..

      1. Christina.
        • 15 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        I did.

        Bought Forster.

        Can't give a feck about my defence.

        besides, I have 4.8m itb

        lol

        1. Moin
          • Fantasy Football Scout Member
          • 12 Years
          10 years, 8 months ago

          okay! Best of luck!

          1. Christina.
            • 15 Years
            10 years, 8 months ago

            ..now the big question...Costa or Ivan?

    6. FPL Touches
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Same. Mane in.

    7. bobn
      • 15 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Me too. Mane in.

  4. The Red Devil
    • 10 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    tick tock tick!

  5. Gooner97
    • 12 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Pants down

    1. Captain Peacock
      • 11 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      My two favourite words in the English language

      1. Lord Flashheart
        • Fantasy Football Scout Member
        • 13 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        Not that there is anything wrong about it

    2. Moin
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      time for Dick's match

    3. Camp No No
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Wut?

  6. Piggs Boson
    • 14 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Sadio(C) locked 🙂

    1. Christina.
      • 15 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      wtf

      😯

    2. Demí
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Love it

    3. Colonel Shoe 肝池
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      sado-masochism 😉

      1. Camp No No
        • 12 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        😆

      2. Camp No No
        • 12 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        shouldn't it be "sadio-masochism" however?

      3. RubeRx
        • Fantasy Football Scout Member
        • 11 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        well played

    4. Lord Flashheart
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 13 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Great choice.
      Would have done it myself had I not have a certain testiculus absentos condition

    5. tm245
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Same here. Good luck!

    6. Moin
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Same!!

  7. Lord Flashheart
    • Fantasy Football Scout Member
    • 13 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Boom

  8. andy85wsm
    • Has Moderation Rights
    • 15 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    I did it....http://imgur.com/sw6Ua78

    First time I've made an almost impulse transfer without playing safe for weeks!

    SUPER worried about not owning Sanchez now. If he starts I will be signing off the internet!!

    1. UKG
      • 15 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Should have captained him though!

    2. Dr Dream
      • 13 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      He's only scored three goals since Christmas...what are you worried about ?

      1. andy85wsm
        • Has Moderation Rights
        • 15 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        Just that fear factor, nothing more.

    3. bobn
      • 15 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Did the same. Sanchez -> Mane.

      Its nice to break away from the template a little.

      Plus even if he starts, Wenger will be tempted to withdraw after 60ish if hes not destroying NEW given his "fatigue" thoughts. Confirmation bias.

  9. Christina.
    • 15 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Looks at balls on dining room table...

    1. Camp No No
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      You have found a date?

  10. UKG
    • 15 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Mane captain locked....

    1. Piggs Boson
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Good pick 🙂

  11. Mile Plankton - Myth and Ch…
    • 12 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    I did Defoe -> Sakho.
    Only one I could afford.

  12. RubeRx
    • Fantasy Football Scout Member
    • 11 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    May all your arrows be green. See you on the other side kids.

    1. Sean.
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      +1

    2. The Nuttmxn
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 13 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Back at you, good luck.

  13. SweeSwee
    • 11 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Up until 15 minutes ago I wonder how many people had even considered selling Sanchez this week...

    1. Doolittle
      • 13 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      I was tempted to captain him!

  14. brianutd-why always we? 20
    • 14 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    New GW started so who to capt! Lol

    1. Woy of the Wovers
      • 15 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      This is not a Lol moment.

      1. brianutd-why always we? 20
        • 14 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        Oh smile then...

  15. Doolittle
    • 13 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Right, after changing all week, Kane (C) it is. Good luck all!

    1. Gooner97
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Here as well.
      Good luck mate!

  16. Christina.
    • 15 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    *runs down street naked.

    Balls still lying on dining room table.

    1. RubeRx
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 11 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      ovaries*

    2. FPL Blow-In
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 13 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      😆

    3. super zlatan
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Slut

      1. Christina.
        • 15 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        Whoar

    4. Moin
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Somebody pick Billy up!

    5. Camp No No
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Bit harsh to leave your date cold like that.

  17. jonnyleeds
    • Fantasy Football Scout Member
    • 11 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    1129.... Kane to Kun cpt..... Gulp

    1. Sean.
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Same 11.28...good luck

  18. The Chosen One...
    • 13 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Austin (c) done

  19. Lizard Lips
    • 13 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    This site would have you think Mane is a messiah. Cazorla will score and assist whilst Mane blanks.

  20. Demí
    • 14 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Nobody likes a bad week just before an international break

    1. Christina.
      • 15 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      ...I always have one.

      I'm probably "selling" my team on here tonight.

      1. Christina.
        • 15 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        ..not enough time and all that jazz you know...

    2. Mark
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • Has Moderation Rights
      • 18 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Yeah, that's always awful. So long to dwell on things. Another factor that led me to stick with Kane.

    3. andy85wsm
      • Has Moderation Rights
      • 15 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Didn't even think of that!

  21. Mile Plankton - Myth and Ch…
    • 12 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Played captain roulette with Aguero and Kane. Think I ended up with Aguero.
    Never liked the ealry kick off captain, though.

  22. Holmes
    • 12 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Sakho(c) 😎

    1. Gooner97
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Mamadou? 😉

  23. Gooner97
    • 12 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    WhoScored is one of the best football sites evah

    1. FPL Daniel
      • 16 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      It is a good one I agree

    2. Camp No No
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Their articles are garbage, though.

  24. FPL Daniel
    • 16 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Pens down. So, let see how my stats are accurate. Goal imminent table says
    http://members.fantasyfootballscout.co.uk/my-stats-tables/view/7413/

    Aguero
    Lukaku
    Alexis
    Sturridge
    Fellaini
    Mane
    Barnes
    Bony (will exclude him cause he ain't starting)
    Gommis
    Ener Valencia

    In that particular order. Higher the table more likely to score. I feel good about this table. Lets see how accurate will be end of week. I will put online bets to some of the lads that will score sure. I encourage all of you to do it too

    1. Piggs Boson
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Kun, Studge, Alexis, Mane

      I'll take it 🙂

  25. DA Minnion (Former great)
    • 13 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Hazard caps hands up.

    1. brianutd-why always we? 20
      • 14 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      O\

    2. FPL Daniel
      • 16 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      They are playing late. Always a good feeling when your captain plays late .)

    3. Nomar
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 16 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      \O/
      |
      /\

  26. Nomar
    • Fantasy Football Scout Member
    • 16 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Hazard captain it is then.

    1. Mark
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • Has Moderation Rights
      • 18 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Good luck fella and all Haz captainers - I wish I could have joined you but just couldn't risk it.

      1. brianutd-why always we? 20
        • 14 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        I'm with you didn't have the balls to do it

    2. Mohit20
      • 11 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      this

  27. davies
    • 11 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Sanchez keepers unite!

    1. Wiz
      • 11 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      o/

    2. FPL Daniel
      • 16 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      o/

  28. U-jin King™
    • 11 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    man too late with trigger...Kane captain it is...wanted to go Ivan!! oh well..

    1. Plymouth
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      riiight

    2. Doolittle
      • 13 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      I think that's a blessing in disguise.

  29. Plymouth
    • 12 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Sanchez (C) will be gold

    1. RabMac
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Not if Wenger rests him and only makes sub appearance because he was talking about resting him at the press conference.

  30. JogaSemmedo
    • 11 Years
    10 years, 8 months ago

    Last second pulled the trigger on Sanchez to Mane! Here's hoping Sanchez is rested now 🙂

    1. Plymouth
      • 12 Years
      10 years, 8 months ago

      Shame on you

      1. JogaSemmedo
        • 11 Years
        10 years, 8 months ago

        See above you captained Sanchez! Entirely possible I could be regretting it come 4.45pm.