The Pre-Match Preamble – Gameweek 12

Granville’s recent calamitous transfers galvanised some navel gazing this week.

I was intrigued by the theory that transfer tinkering, particularly when accompanied by a points hit, was severely damaging our Fantasy Premier League (FPL) prospects.

My investigations were fuelled, not only by Granville’s recent transfer tragedy, but also the fortunes of a certain Sharon Brading – an FPL manager who had hit the heights of 17th in the world without making a single change to her squad.

An innocent in all this, Sharon’s season nonetheless presents an extraordinary case study, forcing us to question the merits of our decision-making.

It became clear that Sharon no longer had her hands on the wheel – her Ashley All Star squad is a “Ghostship” – drifting without guidance, pursuing the same course that was set back in Gameweek one.

That course has beat us all.

On the face of it, she made some canny early decisions. The faith in Leicester’s attacking assets has been key, along with the capture of high performing mid-price midfield options – Nathan Redmond and Yohan Cabaye. Meanwhile, Sharon has suffered injuries, but, as yet, none have presented the iceberg to sink her season.

While her campaign is a slap in the face for those deliberating points hits on a weekly basis, there is one big reason for her prosperity: Jamie Vardy.

The armband has been tattooed on Vardy from Gameweek 1 and Sharon has subsequently surfed the 144 points he’s gained her.

Meanwhile, Granville and I have been switching week-to-week, relying too much on Sergio Aguero and have mustered just 102 and 106 points in response.

Couple that with some questionable transfer decisions – Granville’s Gameweek 11, my punt on an early Eden Hazard revival – and suddenly a yawning gap has opened up. Our hands-on efforts have proved futile.

While Granville and I neglect family to dedicate hours to reclusive tinkering, Sharon has doubtless been interacting with human beings and pondering matters other than the merits of Anthony Martial strike rate.

Everything is wrong.

How do we put things straight? For starters, both Granville and I have to start finding the right captain – we have to stumble upon an antidote to Sharon’s intoxicating Vardy potion.

Digging deeper, it was clear that our failure to find points with the armband doesn’t just pale next to Sharon’s example.

Andy, top of the FFS contributors league and ranked 73 in the world, has gained 26% of his points from his captain. Ironically, that’s the same percentage gained by the current overall FPL leader, Ryan Grzegowski.

Back on 18%, Granville and I can’t cite failing transfers for reason why we’re treading water – our squads have lacked leadership.

Quite simply, we need some goals from our captains and Granville has to apologise to Riyad Mahrez.

Only then can we hope to force Sharon into abandoning her social life, coaxing her into the indignity of actually logging back in to her squad.

Enjoy your Saturday mornings while you can, Sharon.