Preamble

The Pre-Match Preamble – Gameweek 13

It’s been a long time since I last woke on Saturday morning with a transfer in hand.

This season I’ve mainly been prodded and prompted to fire off my trade well before now – inspired by some ill-judged knee jerk philosophy or manic mission to avoid a price drop.

It almost never happened.

Last night I was dangerously close to committing a cardinal Fantasy Football sin. Fuelled by three pints of artisan ale (it really doesn’t take much these days), I was wavering, finger poised over an Aguero points hit.

This morning, fuzzy headed and forced into a premature woken state by a bouncing toddler, the near miss has stirred me to ponder the drives and merits behind our transfers over the week.

Presumably still under the influence, it also inspired this little verse…

 

Saturday night’s transfer is never done,
Sunday morning’s transfer missed naught point one,
Monday’s transfer is driven by spite
Tuesday’s transfer by a goal Monday night
Wednesday’s transfer catches the price rise
Thursday transfer falls for Jose’s lies
But the transfer made on team news day
Is researched and wise in every way
Unless you were drunk and bought Jeffrey Schlupp

 

Sorry Jeffrey, I just can’t let it lie: I’m still reeling from Gameweek 12’s incident.

Much as I try to usher the Schlupp transfer to the back of my lengthening queue of season misdemeanours, it keeps edging it’s way back to the front to remind me that, had I banked my transfer last time out, I’d now be set up to welcome Sergio to my hangover party.

As it is, my Schlupp slip in Gamweek 12 makes this morning all the more uncomfortable. I’m now one of an army of Fantasy managers wondering whether there’s ever a wrong time to buy Aguero.

I’d promised myself that I wouldn’t just scramble back to the Argentine and slap the armband on him. Plus, I’m genuinely troubled by a points hit and City’s fixtures.

I’ve also got options. The switch from Graziano Pelle to Captain Kane would really pin my colours firmly to the mast. It would scream to the world that I can do without Aguero. That I’m made of sterner stuff, with maverick blood coursing through my veins.

However, I need to remember that I’ve actually got three pints of ale coursing through my veins, and that Sergio can gobble up a points hit with a casual flick of a boot.

I’ve still got just under an hour to conjure some sobered-up inspiration.

In the meantime, I’m seriously considering a re-write of my little poem. Right now Sunday night transfers seem like the way forward.

Mark Mark created the beast. He's now looking to tame it.

1,883 Comments Post a Comment
  1. applebonkers
    • Has Moderation Rights
    • 14 Years
    8 years, 5 months ago

    damn, wanted ake

    1. Colonel Shoe 肝池
      • 12 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      purple?

      1. toerag
        • 13 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        lol

  2. Your Mum's Athletic
    • 12 Years
    8 years, 5 months ago

    #watfordfc subs v @ManUtd: Arlauskis (GK), Oularé, Paredes, Aké, Guedioura, Ibarbo, Diamanti.
    0 retweets 0 likes

    #mufc subs: Romero, Rojo, McNair, Darmian, Goss, Pereira, Rashford.

    1. Jafooli
      • 12 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Utd subs playing for Watford 😯

    2. Evs
      • Has Moderation Rights
      • 14 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Couple of new names on there for me,.

  3. Arteta
    • 8 Years
    8 years, 5 months ago

    #mufc XI: De Gea; Young, Jones, Smalling, Blind; Schneiderlin, Schweinsteiger; Mata, Herrera, Lingard; Memphis.

  4. Jax
    • 14 Years
    8 years, 5 months ago

    Mods I had the right team news. Why was it deleted?

    1. Jazz!
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 9 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Exactly! So did I

      1. thunder_mike
        • Fantasy Football Scout Member
        • 11 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        I took the risk of it being right and started Kolorov over Darmian. Cheers.

        1. Jazz!
          • Fantasy Football Scout Member
          • 9 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          🙂

    2. The Machine
      • 10 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Your name isnt Demi

      1. Jax
        • 14 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Demi's not here fool.

        1. The Machine
          • 10 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          Irony

          1. Jax
            • 14 Years
            8 years, 5 months ago

            whatever.

    3. KOLASINA(C)
      • 8 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      How do you know they were right? 🙂

      1. Jax
        • 14 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        cos they were...

    4. Ayew Serious
      • 8 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Because it wasn't a confirmed twitter line up

      1. Jax
        • 14 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Was on man u website 5 mins ago.

    5. Numb
      • 9 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Those poor Rojo owners missed out on that valuable info

    6. stilicho
      • Has Moderation Rights
      • 13 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Because I've got a personal vendetta against you and it's just not fair

      1. Jax
        • 14 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        lol

        1. Eden Azzzar
          • 8 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          Jax hey

          1. Jax
            • 14 Years
            8 years, 5 months ago

            hey man

      2. SHAMESHAMESHAME
        • 8 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Ha correct response

    7. Worzel Gummidge
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Dry your eyes.

        1. Jax
          • 14 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          I crush you.

    8. UKG
      • 13 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      AoA played! Hope Darmian doesn't start now, was never certain to anyway and next week is all about changing things around to bring in Kun 😀

    9. Jairzinho
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 13 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      @ManUtd: #mufc XI: De Gea; Young, Jones, Smalling, Blind; Schneiderlin, Schweinsteiger; Mata, Herrera, Lingard; Memphis. https://t.co/NmcUV1Kt2F

      1. UKG
        • 13 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Nice

    10. The Machine
      • 10 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Updating??

    11. KOLASINA(C)
      • 8 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      DDG and Nyom in my SXI, Ighalo on the bench.

      0-0 please

    12. Arteta
      • 8 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      #watfordfc team to face @ManUtd: Gomes (GK); Nyom, Cathcart, Britos, Anya; Capoue, Watson; Abdi, Jurado, Deeney (c); Ighalo.

      1. Colonel Shoe 肝池
        • 12 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        anya at 4.4 looking good as 5th

        1. Arteta
          • 8 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          I agree

        2. Ziegler1988
          • 10 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          Reverse OOP

    13. Tadic is the new Eriksen
      • 11 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Ah no, Darmian is in my line up

      He's next on the chopping block I'm afraid

      1. Numb
        • 9 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        You were warned!

    14. pundit of punts
      • 11 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Benched Sanchez and sold Mane.

      Gonna be genius or super stupid.

      Exciting. 😀

      1. KANEGAROO
        • 9 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Super stupid IMO

      2. DGW blindness is for Kinnea…
        • 10 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        What's lower than super stupid?

    15. Jafooli
      • 12 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Utd team?

      1. Jax
        • 14 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Schmeichel, Young, Smalling, Jones, Blind, Schweinsteiger, Schneiderlin, Mata, Herrera, Lingard, Cantona

        1. Jafooli
          • 12 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          Newcastle

          1. Jax
            • 14 Years
            8 years, 5 months ago

            Billy Elliott starts

            1. Jafooli
              • 12 Years
              8 years, 5 months ago

              😆

    16. Siva Mohan
      • 11 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      #mufc XI: De Gea; Young, Jones, Smalling, Blind; Schneiderlin, Schweinsteiger; Mata, Herrera, Lingard; Memphis.
      #watfordfc: Gomes (GK); Nyom, Cathcart, Britos, Anya; Capoue, Watson; Abdi, Jurado, Deeney (c); Ighalo.

      1. Siva Mohan
        • 11 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        #watfordfc subs v @ManUtd: Arlauskis (GK), Oularé, Paredes, Aké, Guedioura, Ibarbo, Diamanti.
        #mufc subs: Romero, Rojo, McNair, Darmian, Goss, Pereira, Rashford.

        1. pundit of punts
          • 11 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          that United bench

    17. Rödallegabomb ᴿᴮ
      • 11 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Sh!t has hit the ban.

    18. drughi
      • 14 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      DDG penalty save and a ighalo goal would be enough

    19. Whats the Huth
      • 8 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Ake not starting.

      Interesting. Dropped?

      1. Ziegler1988
        • 10 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Jurado back from injury

      2. applebonkers
        • Has Moderation Rights
        • 14 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        on the bench so looks like it. he always finds a spot for anya so ibarbo knocking on the door and jurado returning to full fitness looks bad news

        1. Whats the Huth
          • 8 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          Interesting.
          I'm on the look out for a 4.4m Defender. Ake was in my thoughts, but no longer.

          Just wish Ward was a starter

    20. Hyperion
      • 12 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Last minute Ozil to Vardy captain switch! Regret it already.

      1. Gooner97
        • 10 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Love the grav mate

        1. Hyperion
          • 12 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          🙂

      2. Alittude
        • 8 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        dont

      3. Murder on Zidane's Flo…
        • Fantasy Football Scout Member
        • 12 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Ballsy. Good luck fella.

        1. Hyperion
          • 12 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          Cheers, you too!

    21. DGW blindness is for Kinnea…
      • 10 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Waiting for that guy to post that he just woke up and missed the deadline and his captain is Surman which he did for a joke

    22. OptimusBlack
      • 11 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Why Rojo Bench ? 🙁

      1. Hyperion
        • 12 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Assuming because of internationals.

      2. Tadic is the new Eriksen
        • 11 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        LVG

      3. Adam West - Team Serbia for…
        • 13 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Van Gael is prone to this kind of stuff . It's why I did not buy Rojo and I will not buy Lingard

      4. Evs
        • Has Moderation Rights
        • 14 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        I feared this.

        2 international games played in the back of beyond....

      5. tisza
        • Fantasy Football Scout Member
        • 9 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        LVG - didn't feel confident it was a long-term option when I brought in Rojo (hate signing players for FPL that I don't rate as footballers) + having already sold Damian earlier in the season. Shaw injury was a bit of a killer for decent price Utd defensive returns. LVG = new tinkerman!!

    23. Shrimp On The Barb
      • 9 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Why the fek is Rojo not starting...

    24. LeicesterA
      • 9 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Ugh, Rojo 🙁

    25. Eden Azzzar
      • 8 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      de Gea
      4 Jones
      12 Smalling
      17 Blind
      18 Young
      31 Schweinsteiger
      28 Schneiderlin
      21 Herrera
      8 Mata
      35 Lingard
      7 Depay

      Gomes
      2 Nyom
      15 Cathcart
      29 Capoue
      3 Britos
      21 Anya
      23 Watson
      7 Jurado
      22 Abdi
      24 Ighalo
      9 Deeney
      Official lineups

      1. Gooner97
        • 10 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Cheers Parm

        1. Jafooli
          • 12 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          😀

    26. Studgie G
      • 12 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      I benched Ozil by accident

      1. Puyol Pants Up
        • 9 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        lol

      2. Numb
        • 9 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Oops 🙂

      3. Alittude
        • 8 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        you stugie g'd that one didnt ya?

      4. Studgie G
        • 12 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        reverse psychology

      5. QPR expects... glory!
        • 13 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        That's not an accident, that's a monumental balls up!

        1. Studgie G
          • 12 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          I think Ozil will blank so started Sanchez instead

    27. Jafooli
      • 12 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Hands up if you've be banned?

      1. Ayew Serious
        • 8 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        o/

        1. Jafooli
          • 12 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          Good 🙂

    28. KeepCalm
      • 10 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Last min Aguero to Sanchez captain switch...hope i dont fecking regret this

    29. Realdeal14
      • 9 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Call me deluded but made Hazard captain. Wby guys?

      1. Epic Fail
        • Fantasy Football Scout Member
        • 13 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        You're deluded.

      2. tisza
        • Fantasy Football Scout Member
        • 9 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Nope I've done it. Gut feeling I've had since the Stoke game.
        If they can't turn it on against Norwich then he's an easy transfer out and Aguero's an easy option in.

    30. Arteta
      • 8 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Lukaku captainers hands up! \o/

      1. Weasel Boy
        • Fantasy Football Scout Member
        • 11 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        Yep the troll it is

        1. Arteta
          • 8 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          Worth a shot I guess

      2. Joga Bonito®
        • Fantasy Football Scout Member
        • 12 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        0/

    31. Straight Outta Brompton
      • 8 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Watch the Lingard bandwagon start to pick up steam this week

      1. Konig Luther
        • 11 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        then he will be on bench and everyone will start complain, like if he was nailed on

    32. Tadic is the new Eriksen
      • 11 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      Omg forgot to change my captain from Barry :/

    33. Weasel Boy
      • Fantasy Football Scout Member
      • 11 Years
      8 years, 5 months ago

      bad start already.

      Darmian on bench 🙁

      1. Tadic is the new Eriksen
        • 11 Years
        8 years, 5 months ago

        he's no1 on my chopping block now, think im shipping for Toby or Vert

        1. Weasel Boy
          • Fantasy Football Scout Member
          • 11 Years
          8 years, 5 months ago

          same.

          But i still gotta get Kun in